Coming to America

Perhaps you've seen the Eddie Murphy movie. Well, not that it's anything nearly identical to the situation in that movie, but we do have four Ghanans in the house this year (their diocese is named in our Sponsoring Dioceses list - Navrongo-Bolgatanga). We seminarians have taken it upon ourselves to ensure that these men experience the American culture as fully as possible, within good moral limits, of course.

Well, the most recent episode of Americana was taking two of them out to Buffalo Wild Wings in the Har-Mar Mall. It was two of the pre-theologians who really spearheaded it, but last minute they spotted me walking past and invited me along with them. So, the five of us went.

After we arrived, however, (blogger) Scott told of the hot-wing challenge. After learning the details from the waitress, one of the Ghanans decided he was up for the challenge - the rest of us were too fearful of heart attack! This involved, however, two novelties for the Ghanan: 1) ridiculous and wasteful challenges (particularly with food) which are for the most part pointless and meaningless, but because we can, we do them; and 2) signing a release form which ensured that Buffalo Wild Wings was not to be held responsible for any adverse effects.

After explaining what the waiver was, the Ghanan quickly signed his life away and attempted the challenge: eating 12 of BWW's hottest and spiciest wings in 6 minutes. If accomplished, one won a T-Shirt which bore the name of the spicy sauce which enveloped the buffalo wings.

Now let me attest for you, the wings are spicy. I myself had two of them from the dinner order we had placed. Any part of the body that the sauce touched began to burn and tingle - my lips felt as though they had gone numb. This was some powerful stuff.

So, having the goal of 12 wings in 6 minutes, our Ghanan novice chomped away as the waitress eyed the timer. Oh, I forgot two extra rules: no napkin and no drink. Amidst laughter from the rest of us at the table, he accomplished the feat in a mere 2 minutes and 18 seconds! We did the math and that's exactly 11.5 seconds per wing. Now that's impressive.

I have only two lingering thoughts about the whole escapade: 1) I hope we don't corrupt the Ghanans too much during their 4-year stay; and 2) Come on! I think he could've done it in 8 seconds per wing, at least. We'll have to bring him back and not make him laugh next time.